ADDICTION
Substances work at a deep level of psychic functioning, blurring the boundaries in the inner world.
Splits are abolished, the fragmented worlds become merged.
Once someone has experienced this sense of wholeness, they may well want to experience it again and again.
The wholeness that comes with intoxication is just an illusory wholeness with a numinous power which dissolves when one sobers up.
So the search to repeat the experience begins, and it is not one that is readily given up.
Carl Jung
For 24 years Santina managed various Units in one of the two major drug addiction rehabs in Malta.
She has met with thousands of people battling with a drug addiction, sat by their side and listened to their stories… some she would meet in rehab, some in prison cells, some in psychiatric wards, others on the streets, others we have lost. Santina has worked up close and personal with many people struggling with drug/substance addiction and many other addictions.
Her understanding of this deeply complex behaviour has over the years evolved into a much wider understanding of addiction. Santina has continued exploring this very misunderstood behaviour ‘Addiction’. Her curiosity never stops and today she understands how deeply rooted addictive behaviour is that goes far beyond the obvious of substances. Some of these addictions/compulsive behaviours often go unnoticed, unseen, denied or merely misunderstood.
Our current focus on understanding addiction and compulsive behaviour is merely to find alternative ways of understanding our pain, distress, fears or anxiety instead of normalising it.
Addictive behaviours is where a person compulsively uses a substance or substances, despite negative consequences, that may include opening a court case, a medical condition or a breakdown in relationships at work and in the family. Substances usually means alcohol, illicit drugs and prescribed medication. In many ways it is a compulsive behaviour too.
Compulsive behaviours are divided into behavioural, mental and physical.
Behavioural compulsions would include compulsive shopping and gambling, pornography etc.,
Mental compulsions would include behaviours like repeating numbers, phrases of prayers, endless thinking or better know as over thinker.
Physical compulsions would include washing your hands, cleaning surfaces or continuously checking your phone, binging and hoarding.
Many may be understood as not problematic but when a compulsion is disturbed, the person may feel high anxiety.
Under these behaviours there is either
1. relief from pain (psychological. emotional and spiritual pain).
2. anxiety and fear.
Usually under addictive behaviour there is pain and under every compulsive behaviour there is fear and anxiety but a person can be suffering from multiple addictions and compulsions at the same time.
Unless we dig into this pain or uneasiness, we will continue trying to supress it, to hide it.
Addiction and compulsion is not merely about symptom control and is clearly much more complex than that, addiction will always remain a compensation for the sense of being devalued as a human being.
“In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts,” (Mate, 2008) emphasizes the importance of viewing addiction not just from a clinical or moral view but from a complex human experience that is intertwined with deep emotional pain and trauma.
In today’s world it is evident that people fill their lives with excessive hours at work, excessive exercise, overthinking, obsessive behaviours in relationships, food obsessions, prescribed medications, shopping, pornography, video games, social platforms, well….. the list is endless.
Today we are more and more driven to believe that we need to add value to our lives by relying solely on external validation in order to feel that you are enough, you are valid, you are successful and so on.
We fail to come to terms that we have created a life for ourselves that just does not add up to mental and physical health, wellbeing and happiness, yet we keep searching for it somewhere ‘out there’… and never truly finding it.
We are living in a very toxic culture.
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.
Jiddu Krishnamurti
You start searching for meaning in your lives, for purpose but time and time again never truly finding it. We start sensing a feeling of helplessness, often becoming bitter at the world out there.
Becoming triggered by the endless factors out there, your anxiety starts accumulating… you do not realise as anxiety is well over normalised, “everyone has stress”,
Maybe you were brought up in a dysfunctional family where you had to learn not to be talk, not to feel and to trust no one, so then you might think ‘What’s wrong with me?’
“That’s basically it. Feeling alienated within the system: a system that demeans people, marginalizes them, exploits them, and creates a situation in which our value depends only on our capacity to consume.”
Glover
Why do you feel the way you do? Are you aware of how you feel? Do you accept how you feel? What concept do you hold of yourself? What relationship do you hold with your emotions, with your discomforts, with your pain? How do you react or respond ? How do you show up in the world? How do you cope? What do you find difficult to cope with? What is you spiritual aspect? Do you ignore your gut feeling, do you share them? Do you carry shame? The list again is endless.
Is it a sense of not fitting in, of not being good enough, is it anger, fear, frustration, loss, boredom, loneliness, guilt, shame, a lack of a sense of belonging, a yearning to fit in, to be accepted, to be heard, to be seen, to be loved…..validated and acknowledged,
We were conditioned to believe that our worth is tied to our level of productivity and achievement, to our succes.
Success according to whatever that might mean to the majority of people in the society you are living in, not necessarily a correct definition really.
So we invest in an image of success or for perfection.
In turn, over time the cost of not tuning into ourselves often leads to more stress and anxiety, where other symptoms start appearing, depression, insomnia, burnout, stomach upset, autoimmune diseases, fatigue, high blood pressure, obsessive behaviour/addictions, to mention a few, like the physical body can not keep up and attempts to get our attention through various symptoms, hoping we will listen and tune in.
In a culture that idolizes doing more, acquiring more, being more, you might find it very difficult to simple to rest, to self care. You have come to believe that if you are not productive than you have wasted a day.
You have learnt from a young age to wear masks and cover up how you feel, to remain silent…. Compliance has become the subtle mask of self betrayal.
Every time you silent yourself you create a split between your biology and you personal beliefs. And that disconnection is what makes us sick.
For 24 years Santina managed various Units in one of the two major drug addiction rehabs in Malta.
Over the years Santina has met with thousands of people battling with addiction and listened to their stories… some she met in rehab, some in prison cells, some in psychiatric wards, others on the streets, others we lost. Santina has worked up close and personal with all the suffering the person and also their family members experience.
Her understanding of this deeply complex behaviour has over the years evolved into the wider understanding of addiction, some of which often go unnoticed, unseen, denied or merely misunderstood.
Our current focus on understanding addiction is merely to find alternative ways of filling the void. Although some alternatives are socially acceptable, unfortunately many could result in being just another disillunsion. Consequences of course vary, but if you stop and think about it, many of the following compulsive behaviours (alcohol, excessive eating, excessive exercising, hypersexuality, internet and other technological addictions, shopping addiction, various forms of gambling, prescribed medication, fame and power, porn and many others), are becoming more and more commonplace today.
The reason they are referred to as socially-accepted is because people are becoming more desensitized to these behaviours.
Are we ready to actually delve deep into these voids/dark spaces that addictions tend to fill and find out really and truly what they are about instead of constantly making an effort to ignore them like they don’t exist.
Addiction is not merely about symptom control and is clearly much more complex than that.
Addiction is always a compensation for the sense of being devalued as a human being.
“In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts,” (Mate, 2008) emphasizes the importance of viewing addiction not just from a clinical or moral view but from a complex human experience that is intertwined with deep emotional pain and trauma.
In today’s world it is evident that people fill their lives with excessive hours at work, excessive excercise, overthinking, obsessive behaviours in relationships, food obsessions, prescribed medications, shopping, pornography, video games, social platforms, well, the list is endless.
Today we are more and more driven to believe that we need to add value to our lives by relying solely on external validation, where it becomes clear that addiction is not merely about the drugs. Drugs is just one of many, nor is it just about the behaviour.
We fail to come to terms that we are now stuck on a ‘hamster wheel’ always doing something, while at the same time creating a life for ourselves that just does not add up to health, wellbeing and happiness, yet we keep searching for it somewhere ‘out there’.
We have been programmed to focus ONLY on our external world.
We have become a very toxic society that strives off external consumerism and validation.
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.
Jiddu Krishnamurti
We start searching for meaning in our lives, time and time again but rarely ever finding it. We start sensing a feeling of helplessness, often becoming bitter at the world out there.
Becoming triggered by all the factors out there, our anxiety starts escalating… my kids are so rebellious, my husband is so distant, the weather is dull, the traffic is tedious, the mother in law is so bitter and so on. Continuously projecting your uneasiness on others you do not realise that you’re avoiding your own self. This unconsciously puts you in a state of stress, where you start to feel you are losing control, and the symptoms start to appear.
“That’s basically it. Feeling alienated within the system: a system that demeans people, marginalizes them, exploits them, and creates a situation in which our value depends only on our capacity to consume.”
Glover
Why do people feel the way they do? Are we aware of how we feel or are we all just living in our heads, in our thoughts? What concept do you hold of yourself? What relationship do you hold with your emotions, with your discomforts, with your pain? How do you react or respond ? How do you show up in the world? How do you cope? What do you find difficult to cope with?
Is it a sense of not fitting in, of not being good enough, is it anger, fear, frustration, loss, boredom, loneliness, guilt, shame, a lack of a sense of belonging, a yearning to fit in, to be accepted, to be heard, to be seen, to be loved…..validated and acknowledged, the list is endless really.
We are conditioned to believe that our worth is tied to our level of productivity and achievement. So we invest in an image of perfection, far from the true meaning of being human and truly alive.
In turn, the cost of not tuning into ourselves, into our inner world, often leads to stress and anxiety, depression, insomnia, burnout, stomach upset, autoimmune diseases, fatigue, high blood pressure, to mention a few, like the physical body can not keep up and attempts to get our attention through various symptoms, hoping we will listen and tune in.
In a culture that idolizes doing more, acquiring more, being more, we might find it very difficult and uncomfortable to pause, to rest, to listen.. We have come to believe that if we are not productive than we have wasted a day.
We have learnt from a young age to wear masks and cover up how we feel that we have now become unrecognizable even to ourselves.
From 1997 to 2021 Santina has managed various Units in one of the two major drug addiction rehabs in Malta.
Over the years Santina has met with thousands of people battling with addiction and listened to their stories… some she met in rehab, some in prison cells, some in psychiatric wards, others on the streets, others we lost. Santina has also worked up close and personal with their family members too.
Our current focus on understanding addiction is merely to find alternative ways of filling the void. Some alternatives are totally socially acceptable but unfortunately could result in being as addictive. Consequences of course vary, but if you stop and think about it, many of the following compulsive behaviors are becoming more and more commonplace today. The reason they are referred to as socially-accepted is because people are becoming more desensitized to the behaviors. It is high time we move away from understanding addiction in simplistic views, or merely as a clinical case.
Sure, it is a step forward, we can not deny that, but is it enough? Are we ready to actually delve into these voids/dark spaces and find out really and truly what they are about instead of constantly making an effort to ignore them like they don’t exist. Addiction is clearly more complex than that and is not merely about symptom control.
Addiction is always a compensation for the sense of being devalued as a human being.
“In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts,” (Mate, 2008) emphasizes the importance of viewing addiction not just from a clinical or moral view but from a complex human experience that is interwined with deep emotional pain and trauma.
Over several years Santina has closely observed people suffering with addiction where the concept of addiction expanded into many other problematic behaviours and experiences that often go unnoticed, unseen, denied or merely misunderstood.
In today’s world it is evident that people fill their lives with excessive hours at work, excessive excercise, overthinking, relationships, food, prescribed medications, shopping, pornography, video games, social platforms, well, the list is endless. We add value to our lives today by relying soley on external validation, where it becomes clear that addiction is not merely about drugs. Drugs is just one of many.
We fail to come to terms that we are now stuck on a ‘hamster wheel’ always doing something, while at the same time creating a life for ourselves that just does not add up to health, wellbeing and happiness, yet we keep searching for it somewhere ‘out there’. We have been programmed to focus ONLY on our external world.
What happens then? We start searching for meaning in our lives, time and time again but rarely ever finding it. We start sensing a feeling of helplessness, often becoming bitter at the world out there. Becoming triggered by all the factors out there, the child is unwell, the husband is distant, the weather is dull, the traffic is tedious, the mother in law is bitter and so on. This unconsciously puts you in a place of stress, where you start to feel you are losing control, and the symptoms start to appear.
We have become a very toxic society that strives off external consumerism and validation.
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.
Jiddu Krishnamurti
“That’s basically it. Feeling alienated within the system: a system that demeans people, marginalizes them, exploits them, and creates a situation in which our value depends only on our capacity to consume.”
Glover
Why do people feel the way they do? Are peple even aware of how they feel or are we all just living in our heads, in our thoughts? What concept do you hold of yourself? What relationship do you hold with your emotions, with your discomforts, with your pain? How do you react ? How do you show up in the world? How do you cope? What do you find difficult to cope with? Is it a sense of not fitting in, of not being good enough, is it anger, fear, frustration, loss, boredom, loneliness, a lack of a sense of belonging, a yearning to fit in, to be accepted, to be heard, to be seen, to be loved…..validated and acknowledged, the list is endless really.
We are conditioned to believe that our worth is tied to our level of productivity and achievement.So we invest in an image of perfection, far from the true meaning of being human and truly alive.
In turn, the cost of not tuning into ourselves, into our inner world, often leads to stress and anxiety, depression, insomnia, burnout, stomach upset, autoimmune diseases, fatigue, high blood pressure, to mention a few, like the physical body can not keep up and attempts to get our attention through illness, hoping we will listen and tune in.
In a culture that idolizes doing more, acquiring more, being more, we might find it very difficult and uncomfrotable to pause, to rest, to listen.. We have come to believe that if we are not productive than we have wasted a day.
We have learnt from such a younng age to wear masks and cover up how we feel that we have now become unrecognizable even to ourselves.
Our current focus on understanding addiction is very narrow, mainly treating it as a chronic disease of the brain, leaving the person feeling helpless and with little hope for ‘cure’.
We invest in merely finding alternative ways of filling the void that the addiction leaves when one stops. Many activites are socially acceptable, praised and supported and with no doubt are healthier than taking drugs. That is clear.
But addiction is not so simple and we can not approach it merely as a clinical case.
Addiction is not merely about symptom control.
Addiction is always a compensation for the sense of being devalued as a human being.
Gabor Mate, in 2008 emphasized the importance of viewing addiction not just from a clinical or moral view but from a complex human experience that is interwined with deep emotional pain and trauma.
After nearly three decades working closely with people struggling with addiction, Santina came to understand that addiction is not a chronic disease of the brain, nor is it a moral issue, but a way of coping with stress, tension, or any uncomfortable feeling.
Today, in our modern world one can see that addiction goes way beyond drugs.
Iphones.
Shopping.
Alcohol.
Sex.
Video games.
Gambling.
Pornography.
Food.
Work.
and other compulsive behaviours.
Sadly, many of these addictions often go unnoticed, unseen, denied or merely misunderstood but nevertheless they too take us on a journey of eventually feeling disconnected not only to others but also disconnected from ourselves, and the truth of the problem is that we don’t even know it.
We have ended up adding value to our lives by depending on external distraction, acknowledgement, validation, creating a life for ourselves that just does not add up to health and long term wellbeing.
We have become a toxic society that strives off external consumerism and validation.
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.
Jiddu Krishnamurti
“That’s basically it. Feeling alienated within the system: a system that demeans people, marginalizes them, exploits them, and creates a situation in which our value depends only on our capacity to consume.”
Glover
Why do people feel the way they do? Are peple even aware of how they feel or are we all just living in our heads, in our thoughts? What concept do you hold of yourself? What relationship do you hold with your emotions, with your discomforts, with your pain? How do you react ? How do you show up in the world? How do you cope? What do you find difficult to cope with? Is it a sense of not being good enough, is it anger, fear, frustration, loss, boredom, loneliness, a lack of a sense of belonging, a yearning to fit in, to be accepted, to be heard, to be seen, to be validated, acknowledged, to be loved.
Self care is not poular.
We have now become obsessed with how other people perceive us, we put up a facade to keep up appearances, to ‘appear perfectly together’.
“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
Carl Jung.
The cost of not knowing how to tune into yourself, using your internal resources, often leads to various symptoms. Drug addiction is one, but there are many other symtpoms you may experience, like stress and anxiety, depression, insomnia, burnout, acidity, autoimmune diseases, fatigue, high blood pressure, to mention a few. We need to get to the core of the problem and not just the symtpoms.
Rest.
With the way our lives are now structured we are finding it difficult to pause for a minute. We have come to believe that if we are not productive than we have wasted a day.
In a culture that idolizes doing more, acquiring more, being more and so on we might find it very difficult and uncomfortable to rest. We have come to believe that our worth is tied to our level of productivity and achievement. And we all know how exhausting that can get.
It gets tiring to continuously pretend that all is well, that we have it all sorted out. It gets tiring lying to ourselves and others. We have learnt to wear masks and cover up how we feel not only to others but also to ourselves, we have now become unrecognizable even to ourselves.
‘You wear a mask for so long, you forget who you were beneath it’.
Alan Moore
Your Inner Journey Begins Here
Take a moment to heal your mind, body and heart.